As an angsty teenage punk rocker, I learned that one of the worst things you could do was sell out. It meant you had no soul, that you only cared about money and not your ~*~*art*~*~ or whatever.
I'm not sure exactly how I was defining the phrase, or where the line was that you crossed to become a sell-out, though. Was anyone who made decent money doing something a sell-out, or was it only if you compromised yourself for it? Where did natural changes that come with age and maturity factor in?
I was a teenager, so I didn't really have answers.
What I knew was that selling out was bad. It made you an awful person who only cared about money, etc.
What I know now is that I really, really want to sell out.
Maybe it's age, maybe it's time spent not being able to pay my own rent or have any luxuries, but I no longer feel the need to live in poverty to prove anything. I want to have my own life with rent and food and pets and nice things.
I'm working on a PhD. Hopefully that will lead to a job that pays well. I am not ashamed to have that as my goal. A nice, comfortable life is important, and there's nothing wrong with seeking it.
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