Thursday, January 30, 2014

Big news!

I wrote a paper for my class last semester about the ways people share information differently between social media and dating sites.

And...

...

...

It was accepted into a conference in Madrid! I'm going to be traveling to Spain at the end of the month. Hooray!

Sunday, January 26, 2014

Band Concerts and Matte Lipstick

Saturday was my first concert with the chamber ensemble I'm in. It went great! I had to go straight from work, so I was wearing my concert attire all day. In retrospect, I probably should have packed my shoes and worn something with traction, because the snow was kind of an obstacle. Oh, well!

Adorable, but no traction.
The concert went really well. I haven't played in an ensemble since college, so it was nice to do it again. The show was in this old church in Soho that is beautiful inside, which was cool.

In other news, I had been looking all over for this Revlon matte lip crayon, and I finally found it. I may be more excited about this than I should be. Selfie time:

I don't know why my eyes are doing that.

30 Days of Mental Health Awareness: Day 30


I'm taking part in the 30 Days of Mental Health Awareness Challenge. Every day I'll post in response to their prompts.

Day 30: What does recovery mean to you?

Achieving the goals I laid out yesterday -- being happy when good things happen, sad or angry when bad things happen, having friendships and relationships, being confident in my social and professional life, and not worrying so damn much.

Saturday, January 25, 2014

30 Days of Mental Health Awareness: Day 29


I'm taking part in the 30 Days of Mental Health Awareness Challenge. Every day I'll post in response to their prompts.

Day 29: What are a few of your goals regarding your mental health.

I want to be able to feel confident and happy in my day-to-day life. I'd also like to be able to be comfortable with in-person friendships and romantic relationships. Basically, I just want to lead the "normal" life of a 30-year-old grad student and feel good doing it.

Friday, January 24, 2014

30 Days of Mental Health Awareness: Day 28


I'm taking part in the 30 Days of Mental Health Awareness Challenge. Every day I'll post in response to their prompts.

Day 28: Explain a “bad” day.

A really bad day is when I can't get out of bed. A functionally bad day is when I am able to get up and go about my business, but my heart isn't in anything I'm doing, everyone and everything around me is irritating, and all I want is to curl up in a ball and cry.

Thursday, January 23, 2014

30 Days of Mental Health Awareness: Day 27


I'm taking part in the 30 Days of Mental Health Awareness Challenge. Every day I'll post in response to their prompts.

Day 27: Explain a “good” day.

Basically, being able to go about my business, having the wherewithal to get out of the house, feeling comfortable when I interact with people, and feeling happy and calm.

Wednesday, January 22, 2014

30 Days of Mental Health Awareness: Day 26


I'm taking part in the 30 Days of Mental Health Awareness Challenge. Every day I'll post in response to their prompts.

Day 26: How is your day-to-day life effected by your mental illness(es)?

Well, on a small level, I have to remember to take a pill when I get up each morning. On a more broad and serious note, my interactions with people are colored by my anxiety. I avoid certain things, I have to carefully plan others so that I have enough mental fortitude and preparedness to partake. I have to avoid certain media that trigger my depression. I have few in person friends and no significant other because of reasons that relate to my illnesses.

Tuesday, January 21, 2014

30 Days of Mental Health Awareness: Day 25


I'm taking part in the 30 Days of Mental Health Awareness Challenge. Every day I'll post in response to their prompts.

Day 25: What is your opinion on forced/coercion in mental health treatment? Can be legal (law enforcement or psychiatric holds) or a “helping” friend/family member.

I agree that someone should be monitored if they are a danger to themselves or others. However, I think someone is less likely to be successful in their treatment if they are coerced into it, because being ready to get better is a HUGE part of recovery.

Monday, January 20, 2014

30 Days of Mental Health Awareness: Day 24


I'm taking part in the 30 Days of Mental Health Awareness Challenge. Every day I'll post in response to their prompts.

Day 24: What is your opinion on alternative treatments or treatments that aren’t commonly used? (Some examples are: EMDR, hypnotherapy, herbal or vitamin supplements, acupuncture, massage therapy, art, music, or recreational therapy, ECT, VNS, TMS, DBS)

Yet again, who am I to judge what works for someone else?

Sunday, January 19, 2014

30 Days of Mental Health Awareness: Day 23


I'm taking part in the 30 Days of Mental Health Awareness Challenge. Every day I'll post in response to their prompts.

Day 23: What is your opinion on therapy? (It can be any type, some examples are: group therapy, talk therapy, social skills training, exposure therapy, ERP, DBT, CBT, ACT, marital counseling, and many more)

As I said relating to medication, no treatment is going to work universally. If someone finds a form of therapy that makes them feel better, then who am I to have an opinion?

Saturday, January 18, 2014

30 Days of Mental Health Awareness: Day 22


I'm taking part in the 30 Days of Mental Health Awareness Challenge. Every day I'll post in response to their prompts.

Day 22: What is your opinion on medication used to treat mental illness(es)?

No single treatment will work for everyone with the same disorder, and that includes medication. I personally take Zoloft daily and have Klonopin to use as needed for anxiety. You are not a better or worse person based on what medications you take.

My judgment is reserved for the people who try to tell others how to treat their illnesses.

Friday, January 17, 2014

30 Days of Mental Health Awareness: Day 21


I'm taking part in the 30 Days of Mental Health Awareness Challenge. Every day I'll post in response to their prompts.

Day 21: Many people say stress triggers symptoms, do you agree or disagree?

For me, absolutely. I just went through this with my anxiety -- during this past fall, I was dealing with my grandfather passing away and the fallout from that, all while trying to maintain my performance at school. My symptoms went through the roof. As the aftermath of my grandpa went down and my semester ended, my symptoms also went away.

Thursday, January 16, 2014

30 Days of Mental Health Awareness: Day 20


I'm taking part in the 30 Days of Mental Health Awareness Challenge. Every day I'll post in response to their prompts.

Day 20: Where do you get your support?

My therapist, my family, my friends (largely online, where many have gone through similar issues).

Wednesday, January 15, 2014

Oh My God, Stop Complaining About the New Against Me! Album

This originally appeared at Persephone Magazine, January 15, 2014.



Next week, punk band Against Me! will release a new album, Transgender Dysphoria Blues, and on Monday morning, the record became available for pre-release streaming via NPR.

The record's title, and some of the lyrical content, reference lead singer Laura Jane Grace coming out as a transgender woman in 2012 and her subsequent transition. It also apparently lead a bunch of bigoted bros in the comment sections of punk sites to avoid the album because "it seems like that's all they sing about now."

Let's get a few things straight here. As far as "all they sing about," well, that's not completely true. It's one of many topics they cover. The two-song EP that they released last year, which, as far as I know, is the only new music they've put out since Laura came out, is about her gender identity. And those two songs do appear (in different form) on the full-length album. As do eight other tracks, some of which are about gender and transition, and some that aren't.

But honestly, if the entire thing were about her gender identity from start to finish, that wouldn't be bad at all. In my opinion, songs that are written from a place of rawness, honesty, and vulnerability are often among the best. This record supports that, too — it's a really great album all the way through.

I've also seen the argument that this isn't a "relatable" topic. Frankly, I don't care. No, as a cis woman, I do not know what it feels like to struggle with your gender identity, come out, and begin to transition. I cannot relate to this subject. But I also cannot relate to songs about a lot of topics. There are a lot of punk songs about drug addiction, living in slums, and watching your friends die. I have no personal experience with any of those, but I can still enjoy the songs and the bands that make them. I don't even want to think about what boring white suburbanite bands I'd be stuck with if I could only listen to people with whom I identify. And why shouldn't punk kids who may be struggling with their own identities have an album that speaks to them? The cis, straight, white, male view is definitely not the only one that matters.

None of the excuses of these dudes really holds water. So I guess that just leaves us with transphobia. They are claiming they "can't relate" or it's "all they sing about" because really they think Laura's transition is icky or weird so they don't want to hear about it, but they don't want to come right out and say so.

I guess the moral of the story is that bros need to get over themselves. If you used to love a band and suddenly don't because the vocalist is transgender and dares to sing about it, that's a serious problem with whatever is going on inside your head. It also means you're missing out on music you'd probably enjoy.

But hey, if it means one less transphobic bigot that I have to rub shoulders with at a punk show, then by all means, isolate yourselves.

30 Days of Mental Health Awareness: Day 19


I'm taking part in the 30 Days of Mental Health Awareness Challenge. Every day I'll post in response to their prompts.

Day 19: Have you ever read a self-help book or a book related to psychology? What is your opinion on them? If you have read them do you have a favorite?

My shrink recommended "The Anxiety and Phobia Workbook," which has been helpful. I also bought "The Mindful Way Through Depression" but I haven't read it yet.

Tuesday, January 14, 2014

30 Days of Mental Health Awareness: Day 18


I'm taking part in the 30 Days of Mental Health Awareness Challenge. Every day I'll post in response to their prompts.

Day 18: What do you wish people would understand in regards to mental illness and/or mental health?

I would like people to recognize that they are a disease, much like diabetes or lupus or something else physical, and treat them with the same level of understanding and compassion -- meaning that people may be fine for a long time, then have a bad episode and need to take a few days off to cope. Or that people may need accommodations. And so on.

Monday, January 13, 2014

30 Days of Mental Health Awareness: Day 17


I took an unplanned break from this, but I'm picking up where I left off now!

I'm taking part in the 30 Days of Mental Health Awareness Challenge. Every day I'll post in response to their prompts.

Day 17: If you could get rid of your mental illness(es) would you? Why or why not? 

Yes. Absolutely, 100% without question yes.

My illnesses have stunted me in a lot of ways -- socially, professionally, etc -- and I don't feel there is much that I gained by having them. So if I could eliminate them completely, I would.